A post-mortem on my 8 years spent in the advertising industry

My last day at Leo Burnett was almost 6 months ago, but today I can finally close this chapter.

I interviewed for LB during a gap between shows in 2011 and was hired on the spot. When I accepted the offer I had never heard of the advertising giant and figured it would just be another "gig between gigs." 

Upon my first week I was immediately seduced by the fun, hip, laid back atmosphere with 2 hour lunches, drunk client dinners, epic holiday parties, boozy team outings, free swag, free food, alcohol on every floor, celebrities walking the halls, unlimited sick days and a team of BFF's. "Work hard play hard," was the motto I was told. All of these "perks" are a distraction from the low wages, high-stress, insane hours, heavy workload, abusive clients, toxic co-workers and morally compromising work we have to do.

The Leo Burnett kool-aid was in your face at every moment on every wall and email - memos, writings, pictures and advice from Leo Burnett himself were viewed as dogma and unquestionable. A Human-kind version of creativity they said. It was like being indoctrinated into a cult or a dysfunctional family. 

My career as a singer & performer was valuable experience I was told. We need people who think differently and know how to put on a good show! They needed certain roles filled and I could play any role. 

I played my roles well at first by rationalizing what I was doing, "I'm making great creative work - I have a purpose!" I had to ignore the data manipulation from our ad partners and media agencies we used to create content for our clients. I had to ignore weaponizing psychology or "insights" we used to target vulnerable consumers. How tech giants like Facebook and Google now had offices in our building to strengthen our client relationships to get more ad dollars. I had to ignore disgusting talk about how minorities, LGBTQ and other marginalized groups did or didn't fit a brands' target demo. I had to ignore when Cambridge Analytica stole data from millions of FB profiles for political purposes and helped swing the election to a confessed racist, homophobic, misogynistic sexual predator. I was supposed to keep ignoring even when Facebook caused a genocide in Myanmar because they didn't have enough moderators who were fluent in Burmese to know that the Rohinga were being targeted for an ethnic cleansing on their platform. This didn't seem like Human-kind creativity, it didn't seem human at all. 

In addition to the human & geo-political consequences, I had to continue ignoring the rampant sexual harassment, abuse, discrimination and groping from male colleagues and bosses. We also can't forget about the females who help keep them in power because they're protected under the mantle of our silence. 

A few months before the #MeToo movement went viral I had started speaking out about the sexual harassment and assault I was experiencing within the performing group I was a part of and at Leo Burnett. I was tired of carrying the burden of trauma and my abusers having no consequences. I was tired of being afraid to speak out because woman who do are villified and told we are crazy, too sensitive, over-reacting or making it up for money and/or attention. 

I had reached a point in my healing that I didn't care anymore what people thought of me. Only what I thought of me mattered.

So I stopped playing the roles Leo wanted me to play.

I stopped working myself into the ground. I put my health and well-being first. I spoke out against abusive behavior. I reported my experiences of sexual harrassment, discrimination and assault. I stood up for myself and for others. 

People are predictable and their behavior is a reflection of themselves, so Leo Burnett reacted as I expected. They pushed back at every step. Retaliation from co-workers and even engaging their lawyers to silence and discourage me from pursuing my path. Their resistance only confirmed that I was doing the right thing and motivated me to succeed.

In the end, I got exactly what I wanted. I left the corporate advertising world on MY terms with my soul and self-worth in tact and I'll never be silenced again.