My life feels like a loop

Everyday I feel the same do the same stuff each day like going to school and not learning anything and I mean anything I ain't learnin nothin and its getting and annoying and walking 30 minutes just to come back home and do whatever I do around the house and play games on my computer and I look at everyone and they just seem controlled and brainwashed and I don't know what to do and damn I don't even know if I am sad and I know that a day is another day but I just feel stuck I wan't something different fun and anything would be fine I always think whats going to happen but nothing happens I wanna do somethin about it but nothing comes to mind I feel like everyone is the same and not many people are different everyone I am friends with at school just seems plain and the same following one thing and only one thing and it makes me feel something I'm not sure how to explain it or word it but I've never told anyone this about how life just feels like a loop and to me I feel like life is 3 things work,study and death you go to school for most of your young years and learn nothing like look at every kid or teen that is in your school and wonder if they even feel like there excited to learn I haven't felt excited to learn when I was 10 and life to me seems pointless unless you achieve something big not small but bloody huge I mean seeing your grand child would be nice but that just shows you've grown old not achievement and I just feel empty sometimes and happiness when I am with friends on discord but that shortly fades and I just feel doubted by everyone around me I feel like everyone pretends to like me but deep down inside they don't care bout me and I get shitty grades I sit down in a chair at school listening to the teacher talk pointless junk that I don't wanna i hear I wanna hear things that make me excited to learn and stuff that seems fun to learn about I still wonder to this day why I even smile and I've started questioning what is even the point of life while walking around the house and back to school and whenever I get bad grades I think of myself as someone useless a screw up and what gets on my nerves people say they'll do a bad job yet get guess what they get grades that I can't even achieve I have a learning disability that puts me down and I hate how judge mental people can be if you do something stupid they'll think of you differently in a click of a finger and deep down inside there screwed up there sad and don't like anythin I'm not sure how to explain but I hope you understand.

thanks for reading my post I hope any of it made sense sorry if I changed topics really fast.