The trials and tribulations of having epilepsy

I have only just found this Reddit and to be honest I've never met or talked with anyone else who has epilepsy because I guess most people would rather not talk about it and thus appear 'normal' or at least that was the attitude of people when I was younger.

A little bit of background of me if anyone cares or is interested - I joined the RAF (Royal Air force) when I was 16 as it is all I ever wanted to to do. I became an Avionics technician and I loved every single minute of it, I lived and worked with people that became brothers and sisters to me and the work was so interesting it just didn't seem like work.

Well cue nearly 5 years of pure happiness, I was approaching 21 and then I went into a practical exam at work to advance in rank, I don't remember going in but I do remember waking in the hospital. First they all thought I had been electrocuted because I slumped into the aircraft and was shaking around violently. This then happended another 30 or 40 times in a few days in hospital and I was diagnosed with epilepsy. I went through the normal CAT, MRI and ECG exams but they couldn't find any reason for the epilepsy other than a possible 'chemical inbalance' and they tried me on every drug they had but nothing would stop the seizures and I was consequently medically discharged from the RAF and I had to live back at home....you can imagine how low I was back then and there just seemed like no one that I could talk to about it. I literally hated epilepsy, it had taken everything from me that I loved in life.

Eventually they tried me on Epilim (soldium valproate) at 5000mg spread throughout the day and the seizures stopped (I believe this is the maximum and I'm still on the same amount nearly 18years later) I then spent the next year trying to figure out my triggers which seemed to be tiredness, not eating and alcohol - which is very annoying when your 21 and drinking is what all your friends are doing. Eventually I discovered (because I still had some seizures and early warnings such as Deja Vu and hand twitching) that if I didn't have any warning signs within the first 4 hours of waking then I wouldn't have a seizure, mine had never ever occured after this 4 hour danger window. So I continued to drink and socialise with my friends on weekends but I took it easy and didn't leave the house until the 4 hour danger window passed.

I eventually got to the point where I was seizure (and warning sign) free for 12months and I took driving lessons and passed and got myself a really good job and moved up the ranks. At one point I did have a seizure because I didn't look after myself and I lost my driving licence for 3 years which was absolutely killer but I got through it and I've been without anything from the epilepsy for many many years (I'm approaching 40)

To be honest I forget I still have it other than the 5000mg of epilim I still take daily but I just don't see the point of reducing it. I suppose I just wanted to write this post to ensure that for the people who have uncontrolled epilepsy that you know there IS an end to it and it will come, you will gain control of it and as far as medical problems go it is very manageable over time. Please feel free to message me at any time if you have any questions or if you just need to speak to someone who is in the same boat and been through everything you are going through as epilepsy can make you feel very lonely and isolated at times.

I wish everyone the best of luck.

Dave