Source
r/BPDlovedones•
countzero_interrupt

BPD and Hybristophilia

This is something that has been scratching at the back of my mind lately, wondering if my own anecdotes are part of a larger pool of data, or just anecdotes. I suppose this would apply more to my BPD family member than the situation that originally brought me here, but have any of you observed a tendency in your BPD loved one or family member to romanticize incarcerated people or notorious criminals?

True crime is a big fad right now, especially among female readership and podcast listeners. They recently made a film about Ted Bundy and casted Zac Efron as him. Some of the reactions to this media content by...certain people...has been bizarre and kind of disturbing. When you read authors like Ann Rule, who is arguably one of the best true crime writers in the business, you definitely see the boundary that she draws between herself, her readership, and the perpetrators. She focuses on victims and humanizes victims. Her book about Gary Ridgeway is, I might say, almost 25% all about the victims and their lives and there isn't a trace of hagiography in it for the guy who murdered 70+ women. That's the way it should be.

But this new fad is different.

I was able to find very little in the way of medical journal papers on this phenomenon--connecting BPD and hybristophilia. This article was the closest I could find, and it is very interesting.. I'm very curious if any of you have witnessed this kind of thing yourselves, or know of any research that's been done in psychiatry or psychology that makes the connection.

Posted Feb 15, 2020, 4:04 PM UTC

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sutureburstNon-Romantic•

She did not romanticize serial killers specifically, but developed a strong romanticization of fringe religion and cult leaders. Jim Jones was one specifically she seemed to think about a lot, she never said so outright but I think there was a strong admiration of how he got people to follow and devote themselves to him. I think the power of leaders like that over others and their ability to prevent people from leaving was probably very appealing.

I wonder if the appeal of extreme characters like murderers, cult leaders, etc. could simply be that many of these people seem to have Cluster B characteristics themselves. However, most of them “accomplished” something big and notable by wielding their negative traits in a powerful way, instead of just spending their lives frantically pursuing The Perfect Caretaker.

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RotterWeinerDated•

ok.. so this is a bdsm thing. I now understand what is going on.

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PNWDayTripperSeparated•

They are fascinated by heinousness because they can relate to life and behaviour that is unconscionable.

They see glamour and dangerous sexual interludes when they see a criminal, and the badder the better. A nonBPD sees a criminal as some version of unhygienic, ill mannered, irresponsible, out of control idiot who can't or won't seek help.

They also want you to fear them like people would fear Bonnie and Clyde or Aileen Wournos. The idea of power by association.

This isn't about an internalized response to trauma and seeking to control their environment by recreating traumatic situations to find personal empowerment.

Their emotionally and sexually immature, arrogant and entitled, and water seeks it's level.

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countzero_interruptOPNon-Romantic•

I don't think there's any logic to it or that they think it through on a conscious basis. That's why you get these claims that "it just happened" or "I'm just drawn to this person." I heard a lot of "these people are just my weakness."

Just another way of saying "The decisions I make in my life are not my fault. Feel sorry for me!"

I am so done with people like this.

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mango_fiestaCustom (edit this text)•

non-family pwBPD idealized and obviously looked up to abusive/dysfunctional people, especially musicians or artists, particularly those with a history of domestic violence. even better if they unsettled most people, or had incredibly "alternative" appearances. she didn't give a flying farthing about actual killers and so on, but to the point where there was no actual human response to it at all. total apathy and void, like she doesn't see the perpetrator or the victim. she gets mystified if someone has an emotional response to a heinous crime or grieves for an extended period of time, especially over a stranger. someone she knew actually got murdered and she made it all about herself. lots of ASPD traits in her.

my father idealized the "vision of order," "decisiveness," and "determination" of one of the worst mass murderers in human history. enough said.

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RotterWeinerDated•

da fuq? one of your family members masturbates/gets off on serial killers?

There was a female serial killer or maybe just a murderer that 'busted a nut" when she was cutting off some guys head with an axe. or maybe she was just plunging it into the guys' chest as she straddled him. She may have been borderline or just a psychopath.

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countzero_interruptOPNon-Romantic•

Not exactly. She becomes obsessed with people in her industry who get in trouble with the authorities. That’s as far as I can really go without being too obvious.

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