Did your pwBPD accuse you of focusing only on the negative things?

I'm currently reading the book Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman, and it references John Gottman's research on relationship success. According to the research the long term success of a relationship depends far more on avoiding the negative than on seeking the positive. They even come up with a "magic ratio": a stable relationship requires that good interactions outnumber bad interactions by at least 5 to 1.

I didn't keep score of my ratio with my ex but needless to say that it was far from 5 to 1. And she couldn't and wouldn't understand why I was so bothered about the negatives when there were also positive things. As if the positives (often just little breadcrumbs) could outweigh and cancel out the negatives.