WIP no title yet.
I’d love to write an epic poem
Of war, and glory won therein.
Of England, France, Carthage and Rome,
And cries of valor through the din.
I’d love to tell an epic tale
Of bravery and sacrifice.
Of hero’s resolve to prevail,
Or to die in service to Christ
Posted Sep 13, 2020, 10:54 PM UTC · edited
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Good start! It does feel unfinished: what does the narrator do with this wish? Accept that they may not ever do something "worthy" of an epic? Write about something more humble in scope? I like the line "and cries of valor through the din"--it has a nice cadence.
Thanks! The reason these particular lines feel so unfinished is because they are satire. I really love the romanticized idea of war, fighting for one’s country and people, or for some greater purpose. However, I also understand that war boils down to humans killing one another on a massive scale. The next two stanzas, which I have not yet written, will follow the same format but create a jarring image of the bloodshed of youth and the slaughtering of innocents.