Not finding jokes that reduce men to their worth funny
[removed]
Posted Feb 8, 2021, 3:04 PM UTC · edited · locked
105
[deleted]
4
That isn't what I was getting at really, my comment is more about how reductionist humor like this hurts men just like reductionist humor hurts women. I don't find humor in the post linked as it reduces men to their worth from their ability to provide something. Society does this enough to men instead of allowing us to just be ourselves.
2
[deleted]
3
Nah no apolgoy needed. I think it is a good point that reductionist thinking that places a man's ability to provide and produce as the primary valuation for his validity as a person is a very real problem. It is also something women face as well.
1
This is hitting on a lot of the same stuff I'm discussing in other threads in another subreddit. Even with something as seemingly neutral as "companionship", it's a performative task the man is expected to give and the woman is expected to receive. Women can have faults and a man will still seek them and support them, but by modern dating advice men are supposed to be fully-realized individuals with no problems, or they're nigh-undateable and will only lead to emotional harm.
Companionship is supposed to be something you find in others, but in the comment chain you linked the people are treating it like it's something that men should provide to women to keep them around, and which women just naturally exude with no effort. If you don't find satisfactory companionship in a person it could be the result of a dozen things.
And this whole thing just stinks of misandry. Like, if a guy is closed off, or isn't providing what you want for a relationship, maybe he's just not that into you? But that thought is never once considered. As a guy I have to understand the very real possibility that when a woman expresses blatant and sole sexual interest in me, that she may well have zero emotional or mental attraction backing that, and may just want to get freaky. But there's this toxic sort of unconscious rationalization many people make where they assume men want to date anyone they want to fuck, and want to fuck everyone, and thus men can effectively be treated like they're always interested in romance with any woman, unless gay. To me, a woman who doesn't really like me as a partner but likes fucking me is a woman who knows what she wants and isn't afraid to ask for it, but I find that women often characterize a man in a similar situation as a shallow or unworthy person. Gone is any consideration that maybe he just isn't that into you.
2
This is a rant about a Tumblr post, not an in-depth discussion of a societal men's issue.
1
I'm would like to do a hot take on this. Most, if not all of this boils down to personal happiness. And in modern society we are driven by the need to 'Live our best lives'. Which means everything else is less fun.
And if your not confident in your decision what your best life is, it leads to comparing and pointing out why the alternatives are worst. So in search for happiness people focus on everything, that could, but in the moment doesn't, make them unhappy.
Combined that with social media and the need to share every thought, you get a bunch of people putting each other down, because the fear they aren't happy.