first post here

Today is my first day of thanksgiving break. The only thing that has kept me alive the last week has been wanting to see my family one more time first. I just feel completely trapped and hopeless.

I was recruited to play a sport at a good school and I chose to major in one of the fields of engineering. I did alright my first two years, but I feel like I am sinking instead of swimming in my classes, I am in constant pain from sports injuries, and I feel like I've lost any ability to be successful at anything.

I'd like to switch majors into something easier but there is tremendous pressure at this school to graduate in four years and I couldn't switch and finish on time. I am also getting into debt so I feel like I need ti major in something difficult to make enough money later.

I'd like to quit my team but they are the closest thing I have to friends and sometimes people that get through the four years get great jobs through the alum network.

Ive gone from one of the brightest most athletic guys in my class in high school to a nobody who can accomplish nothing of value in college. I'm losing my ability to focus on my work and my frustrations in class are spilling over into the few friendships I have left.

I'm scared to go to consoling because if I do get through this I don't want the label. I am particularly wary of using my school's resources because there are stories of "unstable" students being forced to take a year off and apply for readdmission.