I [33/M] and so frustrated with my situation with her [30/F] and don’t know what to do now.

I was seeing this woman and we were very close, on the verge of going into an official relationship. It didn’t happen because she ended up going back to her ex. She said she was confused, emotionally stoic, went back for convenience, and doesn’t know what she wants.

Now her and her ex are having problems. They are on a break. I still feel like I am so low on the totem pole of her life. She goes hours without responding to me on the weekends. When I ask something serious about us, like what is going to happen, she dodges.

Today for example, I asked her some thing about us in the morning. I asked if she realized she doesn’t want commitment or what has changed. She didn’t reply at all. I reached out again 7 hours later and she said she went to the gym and is now at a friends BBQ and was busy. I feel so belittled. I don’t know what to do.

I no longer believe she cares about me and I have criticized her of this, but she just seems so unphased. I feel like I am putting in so much energy to get her to care about me, to talk to me, to try and mend things and am getting nothing back. Whenever I pull away for a while, she reaches out and sends me songs that remind her of me. It is a stupid cycle.

Looking for advice on what to do. Should I just stop trying to talk to her? I keep telling her all I see are the actions and the actions show me she doesn’t give a fuck about me. I asked her to just tell me straight up if she doesn’t want to be with me instead of stringing me along, but she tells me to stop being controlling and to calm down.

I don’t know what to do. Looking for help and advice. It all has me feeling really shitty about myself.