Well, stab me in the HEART with a RUSTY blade...

...please?! That was excruciating.

I'm talking of course about the F2P JRPG, Rusty Hearts, which makes up one of the many Steam holiday giveaway achievements. Despite this, and that it's free, this is not a venture worth your while.

Firstly, it took hours to download, install, and patch before even running. During this time, other Steam games are unavailable for playing due to their one at a time ruling, which means you must stay at the computer (to occasionally confirm something arbitrary) and wait. Whatever, I figured, I'm saving money.

Secondly, and here's the main point folks, it's utter shite. After hours of waiting, the characters I need to speak to haven't loaded, my character runs like his spine was adapted from a folding chair, and although he powers full sprint through trees and chains, he is unable to mount a single step to enter a nearby house. I press SPACE. Nothing. I check to make sure I should be pressing SPACE. Yup. I press SPACE again. Nothing. Fuck! I rebind Jump to Z, accidentally erasing some other command, in the off chance that my SPACE bar has died. I press SPACE. Shit, wrong key. I press Z. Nothing. Dammit. I give up.

...and that is how close I got to another piece of coal in the Steam Holiday Giveaway thing. Avoid. At all costs.

Doing a good deed for a neighbor would take less time and you might make a little money towards a new game.