I’m so conflicted.

So i’ve been struggling a lot with a cocaine issue over the last year. My friends, my family and everyone around me is so helpful and supportive in me stopping.

However, i have friends (my girlfriend included) who will do it with me over the weekends, but then shame me and lecture me about how awful it is when i’m craving it or picking up mid week on my own. I don’t know what to do, As i know they’re free to do whatever they want, i just feel that it’s so unfair to be the ‘party guy’ at the weekends but the ‘the loser with the problem’ when they’re no longer interested about getting fucked up with me… Is it me, or am I justified here?