Apparently getting too high is not good for me ... kinda freaking out.

Over the weekend I went to see daddy where he is currently living which right now isn’t even technically in r same state as I am. I am trying to obtain my medical card so I can use CBD and THC for mental and physical health issues. Well anyway I get to where is staying and he smokes me up at first I am not that bad but apparently I got SOO HIGH that I started having hallucinations, and difantly not acting at all like myself! As my dom he was kind of backed into a corner that I did not at all want him to be in. I was apparently being very loud, I think I was screaming out the word no! Multiple times, probably in directly at much of no one . Me and him are both on antibiotics due to a fucking std that I got when I was single before the relationship . And the meds as well as just my general state of mind has been very low due to that having happened. I’ve had a long history of abuse from other partners as well as family members. That had varied from sexual, verbal, and physical. And I think it would be a safe guess to say that maybe some elements in the house I was in made me feel not myself / and just in general not okay.and that I in addition to reacting VERY strongly to whatever strains of pot I had taken in was like I mentioned earlier made me hallucinate , get triggered and probably even dissassocate while there and under the influence. I HAD no earthly idea that sitting down an doing what I though was harmless dabs and wax would EVER LEAD TO THIS KID OF END! And I Am incredibly saddened and upset that once again we both have issues! In our lives , apparently he himself as my dom/dadddy felt/feels disrespected that when he tried to communicate with me and get me to calm down and listen that I either was un responsive or gave an impression at the time that I did not have enough respect to comply to what he was asking me to do! That in of it self iS HUGE to me being a little and being submissive is a A big, BIG part of who I am! And in my own way I feel like I was trying to get back to a place mentally where I could be the good girl I know I am!

But I was not capable of doing it at that time. I’ve had incidents like this happen to me on pot before where I apparently black out some what and without aiming to become aggressive on a verbal level anyways with others.

I understand why he is upset ! I understand why his family that he is living with would be also. And since I don’t remember everything that happened all I can go off of is what I am being told. And the frank truth is, wither I was trying. To be disrespectful to him or or his family dosnt matter the point is that I was and now I am sitting at home alone scared out of my mind. I m gonna lose him and my future with him