[NSFW] /r/AskRedditAfterDark - "Reddit, if you are getting head during a religious fast (such as Yom Kippur, Lent or Ramadan), does your partner swallowing count as eating? Also, does performing oral sex on a girl likewise count?"

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My understanding comes from JWs but I'm unaffiliated. Their Bible is the most direct translation of the ancient texts and it's actually quite repetitive. But so were ancient languages.

I just think most Christians including alot of JWs are hypocritical.

Ohhhhh....*that* explains it! Yeah, the JWs are a cult. A Christian cult, but a cult nonetheless. No one thinks their translation is "the best" except them. The King James version was a popular translation, but not a particularly good one. ESV, NASB and even NKJV are all better if you want a direct translation. But given the abundance of idioms, and various cultural peculiarities, I tend to steer people who are unfamiliar towards something like the Message. It's a paraphrase, but it removes a lot of the ambiguity that seems to trip people up.

If you want a Biblical scholar who (as far as I know), actually knows his stuff, and is an atheist, I think Bart Ehrman might interest you (he's mostly new testament, I think).

I know it sounds like I'm disagreeing with you, but I'm more sympathetic than you realize. There are *lots* of inconsistencies and things to give one pause in the various scriptures. But so far not really the stuff you've mentioned.