My partner (21M) is significantly more successful than me (21M) in the same field of work and I am struggling to stay supportive and happy for him.

My partner and I have been dating for 4 years and its been nothing but pure joy - we have a great connection and can communicate openly without any issues. We met through Uni where we studied Musical Theatre at a very prestigious performing arts college in which they select classes of 20 students (10 men, 10 women) from thousands of global applicants every year. It had been a dream of mine to study here for about a decade before being accepted - I worked harder than I ever have in my life prior to the audition and was gobsmacked to have been chosen fresh out of senior school. On the first day of class I met my partner who was one of my classmates and it was magic - we were inseparable for the next three years of study.

Covid hit, of course, but theatre and performing arts opportunities were still looking to cast talent for future shows, and so we graduated top of our class and the uni set us up with some brilliant agents to organise auditions and liaise with casting directors to kick off our careers. Roughly a year has gone by now and I'm yet to book a single job. My partner, on the other hand, has scored a series of dream performance opportunities and I'm left with no choice but to grit my teeth and be happy for him.

Its quite uncanny in some ways - we are the same height and gender with a very similar build and features. We even have the same name in different spelling. It feels like a cruel joke!

My question is - how do I stay supportive in this scenario? I really am phenomenally happy for him and it feels great to lean into that, but it can be equally as overwhelming. I feel like a failure to myself and my family and its like salt in the wound to sleep next to this alternate storyline of what my life could have been so far. Its so hard not to compare myself to him and I'm terrified of being left behind once he really begins to take off.

Its becoming hard to keep up the facade - how do I stay supportive and happy for him without feeling like the butt of the joke?