Source
r/ADHD•
throwrayy333

Adhd putting a strain on relationship

NSFWSeeking Empathy / Support

My boyfriend grew up with a clean freak OCD suffering mother. Everything had a place and everything stayed in that place. We recently moved in together and its been hard. Sometimes I knock stuff down and forget about it and it irritates him. He was helping me clean my desk the other day and basically was like “what is this? why do you have it?” the whole time. He says I use my adhd as an excuse sometimes but I literally cant control it. Im on Adderall for it and its still pretty bad. “Why don’t you make lists?” bro I literally have like 10 notebooks where I attempted to do that. “Make lists on your phone” I get distracted on my phone easily. Its hard having a partner who cant understand what you have to deal with daily.

Posted Nov 15, 2021, 12:49 PM UTC

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Fun-Mathematician816•

The only thing ADHD is doing here is making you feel guilty about something you are trying your best to get better at. Your boyfriend is out of line and being dismissive. He probably is projecting without knowing his own trauma he dealt with growing up with his mother onto you. And your ADHD is making you feel guilty and making you feel like you're the problem. You're not.

He's unintentionally gaslighting and triggering you and that needs to be addressed and stopped.

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JohnP0825•

Sounds like your boyfriend has his head up his ass. As someone else stated, it is not your adhd, it’s him being a closed minded jerk. If lists worked, we’d use them…sounds like he needs to get educated on ADHD and how it affects you.

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