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Reddit, How do you handle passive aggressive phone calls / text messages?

Other than getting in an all out verbal/physical altercation? I have had a change in lifestyle recently and some old friends seem to take it very personal. I have explained that I am laying low from the party scene and I am starting to get my life together(secure job, save for house, etc). I recently moved into an apartment which has had more people come out of nowhere acting as though we are still good friends. People I haven't talked to in months stopping by my apartment unannounced with cases of beer at 5 oclock on a Tuesday. Looking high as a kite and wondering if I'm down to get fucked up. I put up with it for a few days here and there and then eventually, seeing as they don't take no for an answer, stopped answering the phone and door. Explaining to them that it is nothing personal, just taking some time to get my shit together. This turns into passive aggressive phone calls / text messages constantly. It started with messages like "I really need a friend right now." Also known as "misery loves company, lets get messed up". Which I refuse to answer. Recently the messages are "WHAT THE FUCK?!?!" "FINE FUCK YOU THEN MAN!!!" etc.. I feel that after 9 months of calls and texts it would stop. The are only getting worse. 10-15 unanswered calls/texts/facebook messages a week. I have heard from a few mutual friends that this crowd has gotten much worse. All full blown alcoholics addicted to coke and extacy/mdma. Now I don't hate these people. We had some really good times and I really don't want to cut them out of my life completely. If I went out for a coffee or a single beer with them every couple months to shoot the breeze and see how their lives are going it would be a different story. I've tried that only to have them get boozed up and obliterated on hard drugs. Then I'm pestered with 10 calls a day for the next week wondering if they can stop by. If i don't answer. They are knocking on the door within an hour. And the passive aggressive message cycle continues. So even the odd hangout doesn't work. How would you handle a situation like this reddit? I would rather not punch anyone .

tl;dr Got out of the party scene, started getting passive aggressive - turned aggressive messages from old "friends." still happening almost a year later.

Posted Mar 24, 2012, 11:29 PM UTC · edited

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