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Hi there. I wanted to give some feedback on your poem.

Really interesting idea to make use of pop culture references in the lines. The theme seems to be about a street fight where a group of friends stand watching, leaving their friend alone to fight for their own corner.

While I like the idea, I feel you should begin to flesh it out a lot more. Start coming up with more evocative ways to capture the essence of that pop culture reference and make it apply to what is happening in that line. It all depends how long or short you want to make it. Perhaps this will help capture the feelings of the situation. The fear? The hopelessness? Sadness of being left without anyone to help? Seeing through the temporary, situational bound nature of friendship?

Overall, I enjoyed it. Really clever idea. Continue to work on it.

This is fun. I enjoyed the old old references. It makes me think the fight is taking place at a school between two children, and while you're in pain everyone else is enjoying the spectacle.

I enjoyed the 'street fighter-y geometry' rhyme, but it feels a little odd to me that the ends of lines three and five rhyme when the other lines don't.

It's quite evocative though, I can imagine the anger and the feeling of betrayal and shame from the situation.

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