Have you ever been in a situation where you let a partner walk out the door, but in hindsight realized that you shouldn’t have?
Posted Jan 22, 2022, 2:06 AM UTC
217
Don’t own anyone. Free to go… but there are people I wish had stayed. For whom I’d been… better.
(Alicia, if you’re reading this…)
12
No, I’ve only ever regretted time I wasted unhappy.
11
I don’t “let” my partners do anything. If they wanted to leave, then they are probably making the best choice for themselves.
I can love someone from afar if not being with me is the best choice for them.
9
No, I don't control people. I've had people walk out my door, and I've walked out some doors myself. As someone else here said very nicely, when people leave, they're likely doing it for themselves. And acting for yourself is incredibly important. If someone chooses to walk away from me, that's their right as a person. Sure I can be sad, sometimes even angry, but it's never, ever my right to demand someone stay, or tell them they're horrible for needing to go.
8
Nope, not even the one I later got back together with.
7
Oh, yeah, I have made this mistake. More than once. 🙋♀️...🚣🏼...🚴♂️
1
No. If you left and I didn't fight for you, I had already given up.
7
No. They were my partner not a hostage.
6
Yes, but in hindsight it wasn’t a healthy or stable relationship or stable relationship and I think that’s why I felt like that. I felt addicted to him, and that is never a good thing. The highs were absolutely incredible but the lows were complete despair. In hindsight I was unhealthily dependent on him for my happiness and identity, and he was neglectful, always kept me on the hook but rarely treated me well, and gaslit me when I asked for him to treat me better.
My point being that if you feel like that, maybe it is a good thing it is over. In time, after the hurting has passed and you’ve been able to heal, you might realize it was really for the best. I hope you heal. ❤️
5
Are you me?
1
Lol maybe.
I think a lot of people experience this because in our media we really romanticize things that are not healthy and do not create healthy relationships. So you think you’re just so in love but really your co-dependent or even in an abusive relationship.
2
Trauma bonded
1
Regrets I’ve had a few.
But then again, too few to mention.
4
Almost never. Usually, I regret staying too long. It took a decade of misery and 18 months of waffling to leave my first marriage. My second spouse and I broke up for 6 months and then got back together and tortured each other for another couple of years. I was unhappy for half of my last 2 year relationship. That hindsight doesn't usually come for 1 to 6 months after the final break up though
3
Are there partners I miss and wish were still in my life? Absolutely. Are there situations where I regret I not leaving sooner? Of course there are.
If someone doesn't want to be with you, let them leave. You deserve someone who chooses to stay, and who chooses to do the work necessary to overcome the challenges with you.
If there's something you could have done better? Learn from it and don't make the same mistakes.
3
Yeah.
2
Regrets sure but they made a choice. I made a choice. You can't make someone stay and you can't make it not have been the right choice for them at the time.