This is a good portrayal of anxiety. Could also be about OCD but it's the same spectrum so it works either way. I really like the last para.
There's also a nice description of the guilt associated with anxiety. Nicely done.

I’m amazed by the way in which this poem was written since you were in high school. Reading it out loud, I love the rhythm. The rhythm and language reminds me of an poem written by a historical poet which I find really cool. The theme is also provocative with it seeming to center around guilt and obsession over past decisions.

Love the style you approached this with, gives it a foreboding feel, as though it gave an insight to mental health, even when the exterior seems fine, or as though someone is thinking back to younger years in anguish because their mind isn’t what it was, either way it’s a very rhythmic poem and open ended for us to interpret. Beautiful writing.


Hello readers, welcome to OCpoetry. This subreddit is a writing workshop community -- a place where poets of all skill levels can share, enjoy, and talk about each other's poetry. Every person who's shared, including the OP above, has given some feedback (those are the links in the post) and hopes to receive some in return (from you, the readers).

If you really enjoyed this poem and just want to drop a quick comment, to show some appreciation or give kudos, things like "great job!" or "made me cry", or "loved it" or "so relateable", please do. Everyone loves a compliment. Thanks for taking the time to read and enjoy.

If you want to share your own poem, you'll need to give this writer some detailed feedback. Good feedback explains from your point of view what it was like to read the poem, and then tries to explain how the poem made you feel like that. If you're not sure what that means, check out our [feedback guide](https://new.reddit.com/r/ocpoetry/wiki/feedbackcritiques), or look 

 

# [Dear Mind](https://allpoetry.com/poem/16331304-Dear-Mind-by-AlphaToOmega)

Embrace the truth,  
put end to guilt,  
flower of youth spring to wilt!  


Reocurring sin, an untimely end will it bring.  
No sun, no moon, no stars align,  
all the fault is soley mine.  


Aberrant ! This damned demise...  
longest loss and lonely rot from lavish life?  


Who created able body and so weak his mind ?  
Killed corpsman, could it be the thinkers child?  


Dark thoughts congreate and all so clear,  
to this day you hold your guard at our frontier.  
Gloomy memory remain!  
Was it all,  
just in vain?  


Now the lightest quest,  
my life shall poor,  
you sweet but final test. 

&amp;#x200B;

[1](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/scqaul/forever/hu9qimv/?utm_source=reddit&amp;utm_medium=web2x&amp;context=3) [2](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/scq6b4/people_pleasure/hu9puju/?context=3)

Would love some feedback on my first poem since highschool :)

Dear Mind