[1040] Supernova - YA/NA Fantasy - Chapter 1 Excerpt

Hello! This is an excerpt from the first chapter of my dual POV YA/NA Fantasy WIP! Going through a massive rewrite right now so any thoughts would be appreciated! In particular:

- thoughts on prose?

- is there a too much exposition/setting description?

- is there too much going on? (I'm struggling on this. My rewrites either get that it's too slow and gets boring or it's too fast and hard to keep up. I'd def appreciated any advice on how to balance the first chapter!)

- how does the MC's characterization come off to you?

- grammar mistakes! (I'm trying to be more conscious of these!)

DOC: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1D-QESYBcYuKAh61lhYVKRE5va17kZtQjd51jjAzFaiI/edit?usp=sharing

Please read after the excerpt:

!This MC has been the harder of the two to write mainly because I'm worried he's coming off as too unlikeable. His character arc focuses on getting over his arrogance and selfishness. Or rather is he giving off too many 'edgy' vibes lmao!<

For mods: https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/sk1dep/1324_witches_of_arkadia_working_title/hvnjaw9?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3