Source
r/OCPoetry•
Capital_Sale406

Fading Memories

Poem

I woke up missing something,

I'm not really sure what.

Come to think of it,

I can’t remember your parfume.

​

Time shut down your voice,

can’t hurt me anymore.

But I still have a question left:

what was the point of all that love?

​

I reached your pedestal, that night.

But you left me falling,

slipping through my beady eyes.

​

I wish I could dream again,

just to relive that white lie.

​

A rose stained memory

was all I had left.

But it started fading,

becoming grey just like the rest.

​

Speaking of you,

how was your perfume again?

​

​

.

​

​

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Posted Mar 9, 2022, 12:51 AM UTC · edited

35
animumdespondeo•

I really like how this conveys a sense of loneliness that’s all too real! You engage the senses and use imagery that is very clear! Good effort!

2
Independent_Way_8861•

This is going to sound funny but for some reason i liked the spelling errors in this poem, the mood of this is really nice, melancholic, and love the concluding couplet.

2
Capital_Sale406OP•

Lol english is not my first language, what are spelling errors?

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Independent_Way_8861•

Kudos for writing poetry in your second language then haha! And I hate grammar police, but: perfume, through, and started. Nice work regardless

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AutoModeratorMOD•

Hello readers, welcome to OCpoetry. This subreddit is a writing workshop community -- a place where poets of all skill levels can share, enjoy, and talk about each other's poetry. Every person who's shared, including the OP above, has given some feedback (those are the links in the post) and hopes to receive some in return (from you, the readers).

If you really enjoyed this poem and just want to drop a quick comment, to show some appreciation or give kudos, things like "great job!" or "made me cry", or "loved it" or "so relateable", please do. Everyone loves a compliment. Thanks for taking the time to read and enjoy.

If you want to share your own poem, you'll need to give this writer some detailed feedback. Good feedback explains from your point of view what it was like to read the poem, and then tries to explain how the poem made you feel like that. If you're not sure what that means, check out our feedback guide, or look through the comment sections of any other post here, or click the links to the author's feedback above. If you're not sure whether your comments are feedback, or you have any other questions, please send us a modmail.

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