Should I end it?

My bf (33M) and I (28F) have been dating for four months. The more I’m around him the more I realize things that I don’t necessarily care for, but I need to know if it’s just be being too judgmental and nitpicky or if these traits I’m about to mention are actual red flags. He and I met at our serving jobs and he was REALLY intense with his feelings for me. The first week of me showing interest, he was instantly overbearing. Showed up to work with gifts and focused less and less on his job during work hours and more and more on me. It became obvious, even to a blind man, at work, how into me he was. At the time, I was so overwhelmed by his passion that I denied him on multiple occasions until I caved and we tried dating. I quit work because I just didn’t enjoy being there any more. We were official and in the beginning I was feeling good about it. I have this man who’s attentive, kind, and does anything I ask him to. What more could a girl ask for…. Right?

Now I’m at a place where the rawness has set in. I catch myself getting out of character with him (saying mean things, becoming distant, easily frustrated) and I truly hate who I’m becoming. I feel like I have lost myself and my peace. He is VERY attached. He will not jump unless I tell him to. He will not have an individual thought. Any goal he has is him just mirroring mine or agreeing to whatever I say I want. He has to constantly be around be (when not working) and in contact with me. He gets upset when I go out with my friends and jealous. He starts saying things like “are you going to go dance with other guys?” “Oh, I’m not invited?” “You’re not going to cheat on me right?” “Why do you wear makeup every time you go out with you friends and not when you’re around me?” All of these comments drive me nuts. It makes me feel so guilty even though I’m not doing anything wrong. He gets physically ill when I tell him how I feel about the situation. Today I told him I needed space and stayed with my best (girl) friend for the night and he was physically ill all day and kept calling me telling me how depressed he was at work, how he was shaking and couldn’t concentrate and how I was being “different.”

(If you made it this far.. thanks) He’s not all bad though. I can talk to him about anything. We laugh a lot when we’re together and good. He treats me like a Queen and showers me with love. But I still can’t shake this feeling that this isn’t the relationship for me. Am I being too picky or judgy? Are his behaviors normal?