I just found out I’m pregnant. Why am I disappointed?

I’ve been in a strong and committed relationship with my husband for ten years. I’m 28 and he is 29. We are secure financially and emotionally. We really enjoy our freedom and independence but are feeling the pressures of the biological clock so we decided it was time to get pregnant.

I took off the pill for ONE MONTH. Then I got cold feet and decided we should wait another year. He agreed. But of course I’m pregnant.

I had 3 different events planned in the next month that would have included a lot of social drinking with friends. I train MMA/BJJ several times a week, it’s part of my life.

I am an avid hunter/outdoors woman and I’ll be big as a whale by my deer season… no climbing 20 feet up a tree, now!

Most importantly, I am a female K9 patrol officer at an agency that has ZERO maternity policy or plan. I’ve pushed to get one and it’s gone nowhere.

My whole life is being turned upside down and my husband gets to just keep on trucking. Does anyone have a silver lining here? Because wtf is all I can think right now.