LPT: If you loan out money, don't expect it back
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Posted Apr 6, 2022, 11:17 AM UTC · edited
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I will highlight a major missing point to this LPT: do this exactly once. Don’t expect repayment, but also be clear you only loan money once.
Either it’s a loan or it’s a gift. If they ask you for $20, just give it to them and be clear it’s a gift.
Follow OPs advice only if: A) it’s a higher dollar amount (whatever is high for you, but also reasonable for them to potentially pay back), B) you have the extra available, C) you do want to help them, D) you don’t want them to feel embarrassed to ask for help.
But also follow my advice above. Be clear at the outset. One time. Are they sure this is the one time they want to use?
Doing this more than once is setting you up for resentment while enabling bad habits/behaviour.
One time (if any) is better for you, them, and your relationships. Money can ruin all 3.
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Overall, I agree with you. But, if they do pay you back within the agreed terms, why the strong stance that they can only borrow from you one time?
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Sets boundaries and discourages patterns.
Certainly there are unexpected life events, in which case I would just give them the financial help, so just a general principal. Borrowing large amounts of money from friends or family should not be a general habit, nor should you encourage such a habit.
This is not to say “don’t be generous”. Absolutely be generous. But also be smart and manage your relationships well.
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I agree!
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Another copied post 🙄
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Nah the post is on loan. OP will give it back.
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LMAO
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I have paid back everyone I have ever borrowed money from and it is one of the few things I like about myself
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Don't loan money to dishonorable people who don't respect their part of a deal.
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If I loan out money I'm gonna 100% expect it back. But then again I only lend money to people I know will pay me back
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Thanks for the advice! I just started my new job as a bank manager and don't know what I'm doing.... Until now!
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May I ask for a loan?
I can assure you, I won't pay it back.
Nothing big, a few million. Peanuts basically.
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I’d love to know the location of your bank branch… 😀
Congratulations on your new position
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Counter tip: Don’t loan out money to anyone you have to not expect to get it back from.
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If I loan my brother-in-law twenty dollars and he never speaks to me again, was it worth the money?
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It depends on the circumstances. Do not expect your money back soon and plan as if your life does not have this money.
But if it's a large sum of money a payment plan is perfectly acceptable to bring up.
I do not mind operating as an interest free bank for very close friends in very specific circumstances.
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I feel like loaning money and gifting money are different. I mean loan by definition is something borrowed with the expectation of being paid back.
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Don't loan money to people you don't trust is much better advice. I always expect my money back.....
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I'll absolutely ruin a friendship over someone failing to pay back a loan of anything more than an absolutely trivial amount of money (we'll say <20 bucks)
If I loaned you 200 bucks and you don't have the decency to pay me back at some point, then great, I just paid you 200 bucks to get the fuck out of my life. Other people have had to pay a lot more for a lot less.
Asking someone to loan you something is basically putting your credibility on the line in exchange for an advance on some cash. It's not a gift. Don't consider your loaned money a gift. It's not. If they wanted a gift, they should've asked for one.
Fail to pay back the money I loaned you out of respect for our friendship? That must mean you have no respect for that same friendship, unless you have a really, really good excuse and show some real, genuine effort to pay me back.
Good riddance.
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🤔
I don't think you understand what a loan is or how it works.
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I'm not talking about a loan from a bank. I'm talking about loaning 20 bucks to a friend. Or, a couple hundred to a family member.
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Why is a loan from a bank more legitimate than a loan from a friend? A loan is a loan and must be given back, a deal is a deal and must be respected.
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Couple hundred?!
Yeah you best believe I'm getting that back if I "loan" it to you!
What you're talking about is a gift. Not a loan.
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Idk why people are downvoting you. That's literally what you agree to when you discuss a loan with someone "You give me this now, I give it back later." It's called borrowing. If we were instead talking about borrowing tools or something, this wouldn't be anywhere near as polarizing.
Someone borrows a tool (that's worth money) and decided to keep it? They're a fucking scumbag.
Same person instead borrows money and decides to keep it? If you get mad about it you're somehow the dickhead?
Some people must really love having leeches in their life, I guess.
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This sub can be a wild and unpredictable ride at times!
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I just don’t give shit to anyone. Need money? Go get a fucking job or sell drugs or whore yourself out. Leave me the fuck out of it.
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Damn imagine have zero friends you can place trust in. That must suck.
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Yeah I never loan money I can't afford to lose
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