I wonder what happens when you are just relaxing this is is wonderful to read


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I really like the rhyme of golden days and Goldan rays.  Makes me feel like the sun is actually shining on my face. I specifically really like 'dance of nature teases me'. Is this an original phrase because it's very well written.

I like this poem because you can kind of assume roughly how much the author had. I'm not an expert, but he must have taken a mild-medium dose sense there's hallucinations happening and color distortions. Also, the notion of nature guiding you is cool to imagine. I've never done mushrooms but it would be cool to experience "oneness" with the environment.

While it's a little redundant and the rhyme scheme could be better (if you are indeed going for a rhyme scheme) I think the general feel of the poem is great.

I love celebratory tone of your poem! It's very refreshing and appreciative the world around us. I can very much relate to how you might have been feeling. 

The rhyming is great, it feels very natural and not forced, which i think a lot of people fall into. Rhymes when rhymes and doesn't try any harder. Rather just places a few rhymes for fun lol. 

Anyway, great job!

Oh yes the breathing, the everything just a little bit breathing. This is lovely and really describes the experience of shrooming.

I really like how the rhymes repeat a little:  


''teases me --> given me --> guiding me''  


It sorta gives it a punchy feeling, atleast when I read it anyway  
it's really nice to read, very rhythmic is a good word to use

very nice!!  share more please :)  poetry is the greatest art of the gods!

Golden days

To bask in the rays of these Golden days

sweet like nectar onto me the life blood follows thee

Breathing in and out..

the dance of nature teases me

as I try to grasp what it's given me

the pulse, dance, beat of the loving tree is guiding me

To these Golden days

and its Golden rays..

&amp;#x200B;

[https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/tymnuk/a\_last\_attempt\_at\_stregth/](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/tymnuk/a_last_attempt_at_stregth/)

[https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/tyrdra/my\_dandelion/](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/tyrdra/my_dandelion/)

Made this while I was peaking on magic mushrooms, hope you enjoy