Source
r/OCPoetry•
[deleted]

Penthesilea and Achilles

Poem

Hektor the greatest warrior in Troy

Dropped dead at the hands of the invincible Achilles

Earning the ire of his sister in arms

​

​

Ares's most beautiful and ferocious daughter

Penthesilea the queen of the Amazons

Their armies fought in a gory stalemate

​

​

While the two and their arms clashed

The invincible Achilles struck a terrible blow

Her armored chest was pierced by his spear

​

​

Upon removing her helm and gazing at her face

Penthesilea's divine beauty gripped his heart

His eyes were fixed on the warrior's dying gaze

​

​

Cradling her so sweetly after wounding her

He fell in love with Penthesilea as she died

And the invincible Achilles was no more

​

​

Achilles was killed by his own broken heart

Never would his love be returned or they meet again

Regret and remorse devoured his insides

​

​

Her divine voice would never reach his ears again

The man will never know her as his wife and a mother

"I took her life! I have murdered my beloved!"

​

​

Sobbing louder than Zeus could ever laugh

Achilles held his tragic love in his arms

His tears unable to wash away the blood of his great blunder

​

​

Fellow Greek soldier Thersites mocked his grief

Achilles viciously murdered the brute in vengeance

Wailing once again for his dear Penthesilea

​

​

Enslaved by her divine beauty

Achilles died before Paris finally killed him

For his cause of death was a broken heart

​

FEEDBACK LINKS: https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/tyzk7r/birthday_deathday/

​

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/tzaten/impenitence/

​

NOTE: This is a summary of one of the scenes in the Greek epic poem, The Iliad. These verses are not metaphors or an allegory. It's a retelling of an event.

Posted Apr 8, 2022, 9:39 PM UTC

53
531840531840•

Love the classics. There’s so much you can do with it.

On a side note - I think any poet who wants to write a really interesting story just needs to look to the old epics for inspiration. They’re fundamental to oral tradition and as poets that is what we’re descendants of.

Really cool piece!

2
[deleted]•

Thank you. What about Achilles's emotions after he killed Penthesilea?

1
AutoModeratorMOD•

Hello readers, welcome to OCpoetry. This subreddit is a writing workshop community -- a place where poets of all skill levels can share, enjoy, and talk about each other's poetry. Every person who's shared, including the OP above, has given some feedback (those are the links in the post) and hopes to receive some in return (from you, the readers).

If you really enjoyed this poem and just want to drop a quick comment, to show some appreciation or give kudos, things like "great job!" or "made me cry", or "loved it" or "so relateable", please do. Everyone loves a compliment. Thanks for taking the time to read and enjoy.

If you want to share your own poem, you'll need to give this writer some detailed feedback. Good feedback explains from your point of view what it was like to read the poem, and then tries to explain how the poem made you feel like that. If you're not sure what that means, check out our feedback guide, or look through the comment sections of any other post here, or click the links to the author's feedback above. If you're not sure whether your comments are feedback, or you have any other questions, please send us a modmail.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1