My mom always being ungrateful, being against absolutely everyone, and mad all the time (pretty long text, sorry. I have a lot to get out of my mind)

For real. It always feels the same. Every start of the day, I go out of my room, tell her hello, and she instantly start talking about problems, example: "They should have called me yesterday for the dishwasher! They did? No, of course, fucking morons, can't everyone just fucking do anything right?", so I'd tell her "Maybe they got busy? If they haven't call today, call them by the end of the day, no need to be mad for this". But of course, instead of taking it well and doing that, she'd just start to freak out "Oh, so you're siding with them now? I do everything for you (absolutely false) and you're still being ungrateful and siding against your mother?! Get out, get out!", when of course, she doesn't threaten me to throw me out of the house.

I literally wasted all my high school years for her (I'm 19), for helping her, I do everything around the house (cleaning everything, the food, taking care of my brother etc...), do everything outside like shopping for food, posting letters, go buy her medics, go to the doctor for taking papers that she needs, I'm listening her to talk about her problems ALL day long, even when I'm busy, I bought her two tickets to go see her favorite singer for her birthday (which is, according to her, the best gift she ever got from someone, which of course switch to: "I don't care about those, I'll just refund you because I don't want to owe you anything!" said between multiple insults when she's mad, aka 90% of the time when you don't 100% side with her on everything.

Even though she's nearly always wrong because she never know how to solve problems without insulting everyone and wanting to "start war so they'll see" like she always says. Maybe she thinks this is badass? I don't know, but I find this truly ridiculous, nothing badass about acting jerky to everyone.

Without mentioning that you absolutely can't trust her, because she'll use all your secrets against you when she's mad, threatening to reveal everything only so she can manipulate you into siding with her.

While of course, she spends her days doing nothing except smoking like fucking crazy and watching TV. For real, she's spending around 500€ per month on cigarettes. And then she attacks my father at the court because "He's not giving us any money while we struggle! Are you blind or what?!". No, I'm not fucking blind. Yes she's disabled and making only 700€ per month, but with the gov helps, she makes around 1100€ per month. And have to pay only around 30% of her rent, I know the bills that she pays for the house, food etc... And I can guarantee that we have more money than we need to live comfortably. But no, she prefers to spend all her money on cigarettes, fast-food and useless things on Amazon, and then complains that "we can't live with just this little money, your father should help us!". My father is the first one to tell me and my little brother that if we need food, or anything, we can go to his house, it's not only his house, it's our house too. And he's willing to help financially too. He just says no when he gets insulted for nothing by my mother, but since she can't speak without insulting, he often tells her no, until she'd finally ask politely other than screaming, insulting and threatening for no reason. And tell me and my brother to go to his house if we need anything, so he don't give her money, because he knows that she'll spend it in shits.

So why she'd attack him at the court you'd ask? For vengeance, because while she does nothing except complaining and insulting all day, my father is living a peaceful life. Meeting people, having a nice work that makes good money, just being happy. And it's sad, but she can't stand that, she always get jealous over dumb things. For example, a friend of our father gave us chocolate as gifts, we were happy, but my mother absolutely freaked out, telling (screaming) that my father is HERS (they're divorced BTW), that they're (my father and his friend) together and they're not just friends, that my father's friend is trying to make us side with her and my father by giving us gifts, etc etc... But if you DARE to say "Maybe they're together, yes, and?" she'd become crazy and, like I said, scream that my father is hers and that no women should be near him except her, etc...

I tried talking with her so much time, asking her if she wants to talk about it, if she have things in mind that bother her, make her sad, etc... But no, she literally doesn't care, and act like she's above me.

I talked with a lot of people about this, but their answers are always the same. "Don't give a fuck about what she says, find a job and leave the house". Yeah, if it was that simple, I'd do it instantly. I'm making around 600€ per month working for my own from home, because mentally, I struggle too much with a "real" job, like at the supermarket for example. I get uncomfortable so easily with all those people around, scared to always fail something, my sleeping schedule always getting messed even when I try my best, the stress being so big that it's making me want to puke, lose hunger. I tried for a month, but it's just so hard... And it wasn't getting better day after day, the same feeling every day and all this stress, I tried but it's just so hard...

I just have no idea what to do to get out of this, I don't even know if I'll manage to get out of this one day. I'm at point where in my mind, I sometimes get bitter about other people. Like, they have friends, a job that they like (or at least that they don't hate), they're not shy so they can enjoy going to restaurants for example, they most likely have a gf/bf, they have their own house/apartment. I know that other people have problems too, and to be honest, I'm still kinda thankful for what I have. Because yes, I feel horrible, but I have a roof on top of me, and a fridge with some food and water, a lot of people would do everything to have what I have.

But I don't even have the motivation to do anything anymore, it just feels like it's already over for me. I know that it's not, but I have no hope anymore in my mind. I feel like I've done everything for her, for basically nothing, I just ruined years that should have been awesome to live, making friends, etc... But no, I've missed all that for nothing. And now I'm hopeless.