r/aznidentity•
july613

I'm tired of the teasing/infantilization(?) at work

Experiences

I'm not sure if infantilization is the correct word to use in this situation, but it definitely feels like it to me.

I'm a 5'0" (152cm) Asian woman and I work in the field of education (K-5). I know I'm short. I've always been the shortest student during my own K-12 career. Among my friends, I'm always the smallest one too. That said, a lot of my students are either my height or taller. I personally don't mind that the students are close to my height. In fact, adults tease me about it more than the students.

My supervisor and coworkers frequently make comments about how I blend in with the kids or they mistake me as one of the students. Or if they compliment me, it's usually something along the lines of how I look soooo cute. Today, I was wearing a simple outfit consisting of a sweater, jeans, and jacket. I questioned my supervisor's compliment since it's a basic outfit, and she said "I don't know, you just look so small and cute in that oversized jacket!". One even told me that I need to be separated from the students on days I wear headbands since that makes me look even more like a child (to avoid confusion and mistaking me as a student). I know there aren't many Asians in the field of [elementary] education, so they must be surprised to see a small Asian women. But my height is not that unordinary, nor should I be receiving so many comments about my appearance (positive or negative).

At first, it was kinda like "Haha that's funny!", and now it's just tiring. I know they don't have bad intentions, but it's SO old now. I don't even humor them anymore or give them a witty response. Throughout the past 3 schools I've worked at, this is something I always deal with multiple times a week. Again, I don't feel insecure about my height. I simply hate hearing the same 3-5 comments on a weekly basis. Do they think that I'm hearing these remarks for the first time ever? Is this something I would enjoy hearing multiple times? I'm an adult graduating with my masters this week, and they are aware of this. Why can't they treat me like an adult?

Posted May 4, 2022, 1:41 AM UTC

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