CMV: You for the most part can choose the type of person you are attracted to.

I have noticed that many people on Reddit and beyond think sexual attraction is something purely magical or instinctual. The idea that you just spot a specific person and suddenly become infatuated to them for some reason; and that this infatuation was a hidden trigger inside of you when you were born and now just unleashed itself. And just by coincidence, this person you are crushing on is generally a local person in your society that meets a lot of the external and internal beauty standards in the culture you grew up in. The thing is that it's not a coincidence, and the reason you are attracted to certain people isn't purely because of the way you are born.

The thing is that beauty is a social construct. What is considered beautiful and what is considered ugly varies a lot based on not only the country or region but also the time period. In many Asian societies and 19th Century Europe, fair-skin was considered very beautiful because it meant you were rich and didn't have to work in the fields. Now in modern western countries, tan skin is considered beautiful because it means you are rich enough to travel to exotic places and don't have to work in an office all day.

So you having a crush on a person isn't really a result of kinks or signals you were born with. Your attraction is based on a lot of external stimuli like the media you consume, your interactions and experiences with friends and family growing up, the general appearance and culture of people in your area, past romantic experiences, etc. Pretty much your environment and upbringing along with your crush's health are the main factors for finding someone attractive. You cannot instantly make a person ugly or pretty in your eyes but you can control the external factors that affect attraction like where you live and what you watch and the type of people you interact with.

There are some biological limits on attraction. A gay person won't be attracted to the opposite sex because of the way there were born. Most people will never be attracted to little children or their own siblings. But these evolutionary limits will only determine who you won't be attracted to instead of who you will be attracted to.

The urge to copulate is similar to the urge to eat. Almost everyone is born with the urge to do both but what is used to satisfy said urge is arbitrary and isn't innate. A Japanese man might fulfill his urge to eat by consuming sushi and rice but he wasn't born desiring sushi and rice, it was just a great option to choose based on his culture and location. Similarly, a Norwegian woman might have a serious thing for blonde men but that's just because she was mostly surrounded by blonde men throughout her life and that's what she is familiar with on top of the blonde male sex symbols in her society. If that same Norwegian woman was born and raised in say Bolivia she would be physically attracted to Indigenous Bolivian men instead.

I personally noticed attraction changes in my own life. When I was middle school, I was close friends with a redhead girl so I started to be really attracted to redheads. Then in high school, there was this Chinese girl I loved in a TV show and from then on I started to be really attracted to East Asians. In college, I got really into Ethiopian history and culture and religion and as a result I started to become really attracted to East African women. All of my types of crushes radically changed just because of the stimuli I was subjecting myself to. If I started watching a bunch of Miss Norway pageants, I would probably be into blonde women next.

TL;DR: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MJZNXATkrQk

So to change my view, you have to prove to me that sexual attraction is either immutable or mostly based on factors that a person cannot control.