Do ESFJs have to learn the hard way?

Or is that just the pattern of the ESFJ person that I know. Its very clear her choices are not guided by moral values or long-sighted intuition or even smart logical choices. She, leaps before she looks, follows others people and wears her heart on her sleeve and they always screw her and let her down. And she never learns. How does growth work for ESFJs as they mature?