I don’t know if I’ve ever orgasmed?

Hi. I’m (24f) a little desperate for help, so really any advice is welcome. I’m recently married (4 months now) and I waited until marriage to have sex. It was a learning curve but now I really enjoy it with my husband. Only issue is I’m honestly not sure whether I’ve ever orgasmed or not and I’m feeling discouraged. Everywhere online I’ve read that it’s something like a release, or comes in waves, and everyone says “you’ll know it when it happens”. But when I self stimulate or when I’m having sex with my husband the furthest I’ve gotten is this heightened feeling and it’s intense and lasts for maybe 5-10 seconds at a time, but there’s never that release I’ve read about. I talked a bit with my mom about it, but she couldn’t give me a clear answer and said it took her 10 years to orgasm herself. Is the heightened feeling a type of orgasm or am I on the cusp and just can’t get to that end stage? Please tell me your thoughts!