TW: trying to stay in the present moment. really distressing weekend

TW: NSSI (self harming) mentioned.

This weekend we went to an intake interview for possibly getting into an IOP. Our EMDR T went with us to support us. We disassociated a lot, and were very, very anxious. If our T hadn't been there, we couldn't, wouldn't have gone through the intake.

We cried a lot during the intake. We told the intake person that we struggle with NSSI, we self harmed that morning. The person FORCED us to show them our self harm scar, we felt so very, very ashamed!!! They said it was because they wanted to make sure we didn't need medical attention.

The intake person could hardly speak english. She was from another country and had a very, very, thick accent. It made the intake so much harder. 😞😔.

We were numb all day yesterday.

This morning we were whimpering, whining, writhing in bed in distress, thinking about the intake. The words we wanted to say, were stuck inside. Stupid alexithymia!

We texted our EMDR T this morning and he helped us.

We're doing our best to stay in the present moment.

Thanks for listening.