Is it possible for men to change? points of view from both genders is helpful. Ladies, how did you ask your guy to step it up? Men, what would be the best way to bring something sensitive like this up?

I've been with my fella for 2 years now. We get along very well. very few legit fights. He is really sweet and a total 180 from my ex. The only real issues that are coming to my attention is that 1.) I dont really get what I put into the relationship and 2.) my sex drive is WAY higher than his. I've always been the type of person to put my all into a relationship. I'm excited to come home to him, i'm excited when he comes home to me, I like to give him back rubs and foot rubs and blow jobs and spend time throughout the day thinking of nice things to do for him. I get almost none of that in return anymore. what I do get is rare but really appreciated. and it kinda beats my spirit down. even that I can live with but its the general lack of physical attention that is driving me absolutely mad. im running out of batteries if you catch my drift. and my self esteem is shot to shit. I dont seem to get much out of him that I wasnt already getting in Jr. High. hand holding and smooches sure. but I cant remember the last time I was kissed with any genuine passion. and the gap between love sessions has me pulling my hair out. for one he says doing it too much makes it not special anymore. Fucking doesnt have to be special. sometimes its just meant to feel fucking awesome! I understand kinda when he says he's not always in the mood and that he would like me to initiate it. except I like to initiate it with kissing...which he pulls away from. I'm at my wits end. Im not a cheater. I refuse to search for satisfaction elsewhere. and no hes not gay. and no its not my breath. there just doesnt seem to be any way to bait him into coming at me. I wander around naked, I wear sexy little nothings, I pull him on the bed, wrap my legs around him and damn near chew through his neck. nothing. Ladies have any of you ever had this problem? how did you fix it!? Men are these even fixable problems? how do I bring any of this up without destroying his ego...and my chances of getting laid. actual replies only. I'm not in a joking mood right now. thank you all in advance. you may be saving a relationship 13 years in the making.