r/OCPoetry•
[deleted]

As It Hurts Them So

Poem

[deleted]

Posted Jul 23, 2022, 5:50 AM UTC · edited

106
zeldawiiu117•

really cool poem. It made me imagine blue lines "of control" flowing for a person's hand and spreading through the world. I didn't understand the last two lines tho. I also really like that you mentioned that control hurts, or maybe it's a more important part of the poem since it's also the title. Keep writing

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Sheorn•

Hey, thank you. I actually envisioned blue lines as I wrote it, too! Haha, that’s interesting.

Yeah, I spose the the last two lines were a bit more personal. It was written quite a few months ago, now. It was just venting after something happened, so the tomorrow for me was a double entendre of either I’m stuck in a cycle and the same things going to happen tomorrow, or that I’ve still got hope for tomorrow and will. Again, that’s a pretty personal interpretation, so I did remove that after reading your comment.

It didn’t original have a title and needed one, and I just thought it was a cool title. But yeah, I definitely find that to be true, whether they’re aware of the hurting or not (it also makes for a very loose double meaning)

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zeldawiiu117•

Wow, thanks for the explanation, if I were in you I would have kept the last part of the poem, there's nothing bad about putting part of your life in poetry.

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Sheorn•

No problem. I’ve still got it in there in my notes app. I just removed it for the post to keep the imagery intact a bit more.

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Oddly-Entertained•

I love this, it is so simple yet so deep. It is anger, sorrow, and sadness worded so well

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