What is the most hilarious display of innocence that you have ever witnessed? (possibly nsfw)

Yesterday, I was talking to a friend about relationships, and somehow the conversation came around to strange and silly prerequisites for a boyfriend/girlfriend. We both were laughing at the fact that one of her main needs was a guy who would go see "kiddie" animated films with her, when she manages to get out this gem;

"I have a friend who really wants to date a guy with big feet and big hands. I don't get it- wouldn't that make him look like a clown?"

I collapsed in a fit of laughter, until I realized her genuine confusion. "You don't know what big hands mean?"

She gave me a weird look. "No, do they mean something?"

I had to explain to my 26 year old friend the urban legend that hand/feet sizes correspond to dick length.

Over the course of the evening, I also had to explain fingering, hand jobs, and what each individual base meant. ("Wait, I know this... first base is... a handshake? Isn't second a kiss on the cheek?" "No, my friend, no it is not.")

So I was wondering, Reddit: What is the most blatant and/or hilarious display of innocence you have ever witnessed?