[19/m] Not sure about what to do about my girlfriend (20/f)

Let's name me: Mike My Girlfriend: Susie

We've been together for almost three years now. Essentially, we grew up together and have had many very positive and very negative experiences between one another.

The past year, our first year in college, has been by far the roughest on us.

Let's start when all the problems started happening: One year into our relationship she asks if I've ever watched porn. I honestly told her I had but not anytime recently. This broke her heart, tore her to pieces, and continues to be a semi-problem to this day.

In general, I'm a very sensitive nice guy, and she is a nice girl, but for some reason she's always been hard and mean to me. Frankly, it hurts me severely and she knows that. That's why she is mean when she is angry: to hurt me.

Ever since she asked me about having watched porn, our relationship has been changed.

Since this incident, in a time span of two years I have repeatedly gotten my heart broken from her verbal abuse. Just recently I have started to become mean as well. This is not my nature.

We've dealt with physical abuse as well. She started off hitting me for fun (Like playfully) even though she knew I didn't like it. She continued to do this and increase in aggressiveness until one day I hit back. Short story is: It progressed and got pretty bad, but we have not physically harmed one another in months.

Recently, as in the past few months, her "meanness" and her breaking up with me really started to mentally weigh on me. I became depressed and our relationship got worse and I no longer felt in love with her, so two weeks ago I broke things off with her.

Well, she kept calling me and texting me, guilt tripping into coming back, so I did. Big mistake. I tried so hard to repair things with flowers, and movies, and doing anything I could to try to rekindle my love for her. It hasn't worked and I just continue to hurt her by being with her, because she knows that I'm trying to rekindle the love that we once had.

Just tonight, things weren't going great, I was at her family's house, and she started asking me an onslaught of questions.

Do you want to marry me? - Not if I fail to rekindle my love for you. Do you want to be with me? - Yes Do you see a future between us? - Only short term at this time.

She didn't like what she heard she can't take it anymore and she calmly said maybe we should break up, and so I agree. She starts bawling, crying hysterically, and her Dad comes in and starts chewing my ass out for "fucking with her head" saying I've done this crap (breaking up with her then getting back together) three or four times now. After he's done, I tell Susie that I'm leaving. She then physically does not let me leave for approximately five minutes as she continues to cry and carry on. Only when her father comes back into her room does she let go of me and let me walk on out to my car.

As I'm walking out her father tells me he wants to talk with me on the porch so I comply. He tells me again how I can't keep "fucking with her head" by getting back with her after I had broken up with her. He then tells me we have no major problems and the best thing we have is trust.

He said trust is the biggest thing and you guys have it.
He then tells me I can do two things:

1. Fade on out of her life (no cold turkey)
2. Stay with her and work on stuff

He goes inside and I tell him to have a goodnight, and I drive on home.

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How she has been mean:

• insults my physical appearance
• told me I was fat (175lbs)
• vowed to me she would never marry me, ever.
• vowed she would never accept any engagement proposal, ever.
• Tells me I want other women and treats me as if I do. (I don't)

Just yesterday I mentioned wanting to see "Project X" for the hell of it as we walked through target. She then quickly replied with "I would never watch that movie. It has girls dancing on tables topless and shit, But I guess that's what you like." Then she continues to grill me about how I like that sort of stuff, I ogle other women, and I'm a bad boyfriend because of it. Later she apologized, but it's this kind of stuff I deal with on a semi-regular basis.

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Now I'm left with the question: Do I really want to stay with her? or Do I really want to break up with her?

Take away being "mean" and she's a great gal overall. She's hardworking, attractive, career driven, smart, ect. It just weighs on me because I am a sensitive man and and she's taken full advantage of that.

Any responses are appreciated, Thank you.

TL;DR: Girlfriend is mean a lot. I don't feel "in love" with her anymore. We've gone through a lot.