Work and Kids

Wife and I are expecting our first kid in December (yay!) We have been talking and trying to figure out as much as we can before our little dude shows up, pretty much just spending a several hours a week reading books on caring for our first little dude.

One of the biggest daunting factors has to do with working and spending time with the kid. Both the wife and I work full time as of right now. I'm picking up a job that can be anywhere from 8-12 hours a day of work at a rather high pay rate, which is enough to afford all of our bills and jazz like that, but It doesn't afford much time for swapping the kid if she's still working as I'll be leaving at 4 or 5am and be back around 4 or 5 pm.

I feel like asking my wife not to go back to work full time is going to be hard and a really big change (this is likely to change, but this is how it seems) and I also feel like this could lead to money arguments in the future as often when one party is doing all the money making and the other is doing the money spending this occurs a lot.

I'm ranting, so here's a TL;DR: How did you find the balance between you and your SO both working and taking care of your kid(s) or one party working while the other does the brunt of the Kid stuff.