A question about BDSM tools and being single.

What kinds of things can you get away with having in your house between partners? Girls can probably get away with being more fully stocked than guys, I imagine (heterosexual guys, at least). Like, a girl can go "Here is one of my dildos, I use it on myself a lot. Use it on me, please." and that's perfectly normal. But if a guy went "I have a dildo. Do you want me to use it on you?" that would obviously be really creepy. The girl would be like "What? No. I have no idea where that's been." Same with ball gags and nipple clamps, probably, right?

Bondage tape seems fine to me because it's disposable; the stuff on the roll has never been touched, and the used portion was thrown out long ago.

What about handcuffs? Fuzzy handcuffs? Riding crops? Whips? Slappers? Rope?

My working theory is: the person it's being used on should keep it in the event of a breakup, and the person who wielded it should wait until a new partner shows up, and pick the new item out with them. Unless the bottom has one already.

Does ease of cleaning matter? Silicone dildos are non-porous and totally sterilizable, but I imagine most girls would not want to use one if they don't know where it's been, no matter how thoroughly it's been boiled, and that's totally understandable.

I'm a heterosexual male dom, so answers that apply to my situation would be most fitting, but please talk about rules for anyone, male or female, sub or dom, gay or straight, because it would be different for every kind of person, I imagine.