Hey Reddit bros, ever been in a one-sided love/hate relationship?

Here's my anecdote: While in high school I was friends with two girls (we'll call them #1 and #2) who were in the top 5 of our class, as well as myself. I was in pretty much the majority of classes with them, and after a year or so, we all became friends of sorts (I'm SAP, and this was by far alien territory.) They would always come to me for help on homework and we'd cheat off eachother, that was pretty much the extent of the relationship.

After a year of this, things got weird between me and #1 because her boyfriend had an issue with me being in most of her classes while he wasn't (typical high school jock, right?) They ended it by breaking up, and she was pretty cool and straight-forward with me for a while. Then she got another boyfriend and that pretty much ended the friendship (on her terms, I didn't realize what happened until later), and she didn't speak to me for the better part of a year, and only on a pretty much need-to-know basis at that.

So I was left with #2. This is when shit got fucked, atleast for me. I had already messed up my grades last year and slipped ranks in class, meanwhile both #1 and #2 took their places right above me. I was pissed off about it, but later blamed myself because I wasted a lot of time that year.

Meanwhile the next semester, me and #2 have every FUCKING class together, except 2 periods. At first I took this as a blessing, because I legitimately liked her, then after a semester, I realized I had fucked up.

That year of high school I worked harder than I ever had in my life. And every time grades came in, her's were the same as mine, if not higher by just slivers of points. I never brought up the subject to her, but it began eating away at my soul. I knew that she cheated off me a lot, but then I figured she must have been getting higher grades from something else.

This is when I found out about what I call now "bitching to the teacher," which is what it was. Every class, too. Not only that, but she was using people in certain classes to pretty much do her work for her, such as using the illegal mexican students for spanish; all the while her best friend, who was a senior, gave #2 all her notes from previous years to cheat with.

So I decided to sabotage her. I resolved that if she asked for help, I would either deny it or lie about answers (this sounds bad, but I had already dealt with it for 2 years and was fed up.) And low and behold, I got fucked on this one, because a "mutual friend" of mine and hers heard me say that I didn't care whether #2 found out that I had lied.

Like every other thing in high school, details were disputed and she only heard that I'd changed answers, not intentionally to fuck with her. So things went to back to normal, and instead of furthering my plot against #2, I shut her out, and pretty much did what #1 did to me, except without having a SO.

Months passed and my life became miserable. I berated myself for ever liking a girl that would interfere with my studies. At the same time, I also hated myself for not telling her how I felt about her cheating, and the fact that I had fallen for her LONG before problems arose.

Near the end of that year I began hating the school I went to. Problems within the school board and administration arose. When I increasingly needed to talk to the office about upcoming college things, I was pretty much told to fuck off, they'd had problems with my family before.

Back to the heart of the manner, my grades picked up near the end of the year. I was feeling good about life, I was being civil to #2 and she still laughed at my jokes. Life couldn't be better it seemed, and some friends believed I had finally returned to being the Valedictorian of our class.

NOPE.

Right at the very end of school, shit came crashing down. Come to find out, #2 (who had not won any 'highest grade in class' achievements) advanced her rank up to second, while I stayed where I was at fourth (having won multiple 'highest grade in class' awards.)

I called bullshit on this and went to the office, where of course they refused to tell me anything.

I resolved that something must have been skewing the grades, so I began investigating.

If you've ever gone to a small school, you would know that atheletes rule. That being the the case, both #1 and #2 were star atheletes in major sports, we're talking all-state stuff. I had said "fuck it" long ago and quit sports because I hated our coaches and admittedly, I wasn't a superstar player.

I eventually gathered that the most likely reason that #1 and #2's ranks had remained high was that both had parents extremely close to our school board. This was the case with the rest of the top 5, excluding me, because for past reasons, they hated my family's guts.

I did everything I could, I went to the principal with questions about it, I went to the councilor, and no one would help me figure it out. How could my grades be higher and she still have the higher rank? I didn't make sense at all, and I couldn't come up with a better explanation than that things weren't what they seemed.

In the end, I was forced to lick my wounds and walk away. I told my parents that if I was ever seriously wronged by the school again, I'd refuse to walk for graduation (this seemed like a threat at the time, as I was class president and would more than likely be speaking.) I was told that it could jepordize my college scholarships though, and I resolved to just deal with it (I had been contacted by every Ivy League college, didn't want to fuck that up.)

So in the omega, I resolved to shut everyone out. To this day I haven't spoken to anyone from my school, not even my friends (who are basically fairweather at best.) And I have to say life has been good, though college is a bitch at times.

So there you have it: My love/hate would-be-relationship-if-I-wasn't-SAP. The only reason I'm thinking about it now is because of my scumbag brain, making me dream about #2. And although I didn't say it at the beginning of this story, I am a senior in high school at the moment and still have one more year of bullshit. God help me, I make it through, love or hate.

Have a good day everyone.