Source
r/DID•
2oev

Is there any safe space…

Support

So after a long year of distress and therapy, my therapist has helped me realize I have some level of structural dissociation. Through EMDR she’s contacted and later made me aware of a little in my brain. I’m not diagnosed disordered but I’ve spent the last 8 months of dealing with time loss and waking up in the middle shifts I don’t remember working suddenly needing to leave. Sometimes when I’m stressed I hear voices or even just block out what I’m doing until I’m done with it. My partner is worried. It’s causing issues with work. Most of all it’s stressful and isolating and even though I’m not diagnosed so it’s fucking annoying trying to find anyone who relates, doesn’t look at me with stigmatized eyes, and doesn’t tell me what I do and don’t feel. Suggestions ig?

Posted Jul 31, 2022, 6:30 PM UTC

3727
AshleyBoots•

Mental health professionals are your best bet.

Speaking from the experience of almost having died due to getting involved with that community: stay away from "plural" spaces online. They're full of misinformation about how systems form and function, and buying into that nonsense will delay healing.

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2oevOP•

Yeah that’s been my take on the spaces I’ve seen. I’m already a trans woman, I don’t need to be infantilized/gatekept/romanticized by my own community any more than I already am.

10
AshleyBoots•

As a fellow trans woman, I feel this.

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[deleted]•

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LCBourdo•

I agree that online research should be limited to articles by experts - but even that can be dicey. After all, who is a reliable expert?

I would seriously urge you to limit your research to reliable organizational resources such as the International Society for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation (https://www.isst-d.org/), the foremost research organization on DID and other dissociative disorders. They're solid.

The National Alliance for Mental Illness (https://nami.org/)is a reputable non profit advocacy and support organization. Extensive library and research-based information.

My last go to is the Sheppard Pratt Trauma Disorders Program (https://www.sheppardpratt.org/care-finder/the-trauma-disorders-program/). Consistently ranked in the top two trauma treatment facilities in the nation, the website has quite comprehensive and reliable information.

I was also seriously urge you to avoid most DID forums, and even take what you read here with a grain of salt. If you read something of interest, look it up on one of the sites above before you take it seriously.

This is just my opinion: DID appears to have become the latest trend in mental health diagnoses, and the amount of misinformation out there (including downright dangerous information is STAGGERING.

13
2oevOP•

This is very useful thank you. Is there any misinformation I need to be wary of that’s prevalent within healthcare professionals? I’m trying to just listen to my care team and tune out plurality

2
LCBourdo•

Just beware, unfortunately, that there is still disagreement even within the psychological community about how DID should be diagnosed and treated. Dissociative Trauma Disorders is still a relatively new field of research. Do your own research (especially at the sites I mentioned), work with a therapist who is either trained in DID or has a specific CPTSD background (not just trauma or PTSD) and is willing to learn, and ask lots of questions. ISSTD can also provide help in finding qualified therapists. Oh, and the best book I know of on the subject, and which is used by the trauma disorders program at Sheppard Pratt hospital, is Coping With Trauma Related Disorders, linked below. It's an expensive book by self-help book standards, but it is worth every penny.

Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation: Skills Training for Patients and Therapists (Norton Series on Interpersonal Neurobiology) https://g.co/kgs/g8MjYw

Best wishes to you.

4
2oevOP•

Thank you so much you’ve been so helpful :)

2
nttogt•

I think you should continue to seek community, find something or someone you can relate to. And continue to explore your parts in therapy. There's a lot of good books on structural dissociation, CPTSD, trauma, etc. that you can read or listen to the audiobooks. Don't worry too much about a specific diagnosis. I haven't found a specific safe place for myself online, but I find some sense of community here.

5
SirsPrettyKitten•

Inform yourself. Look into DID and dissociation in general. (And i dont mean just google and read Quora answers.) Read literature that has been written about the topic by people who have actual knowledge. Be prepared that things like this usually form from trauma our bodies have kept hidden so please be cautious as you move forward.

Try and get professional help if you can specifically for dissociative disorders if your therapist does not specialize in this field. Though i acknowledge that can be a lengthy, difficult, and at times invalidating process. When/if you do uncover any hidden traumas it will be so beneficial to have a trusted and professional support person to be there for you.

If you are unable to speak with someone who specializes in this specific area, perhaps try looking into support groups. Though there will always be people and things to watch out for that are harmful, there will also be a lot of things im sure you relate to as well that might make you feel better. I know without this subreddit and seeing others i can relate to i would be lost.

Last thing, not sure if you are already doing this or not, but try keeping a journal every single day. Maybe you will start to see a pattern that sets off a "trigger" for these things. I personally use a journal app because i find it easier, and i have started seeing and understanding some things about myself much more.

Im not sure if this is helpful but im currently going through something somewhat similar and i still sometimes feel overwhelmed even though i started trying to figure this all out months ago so i wanted to reach out.

Wishing you the best in your journey ❤️

4
2oevOP•
  1. I’m not reading anything, I’ve paid several professionals thousands of dollars for their time reading it lol
  2. I will definitely try journaling. It has helped me in the past
  3. Do you have any recommendation for support groups that are maybe less.. personal? Where people feel less entitled to your personal life and just speak to you like a human
0
SirsPrettyKitten•

Professionals are good SUPPORT, but i think its kind of your responsibility to read up on this and educate yourself. There are many "professionals" who dont know their own a** from a hole in the ground so putting your healing 100 percent in their hands seems very foolish especially if you are having problems in your every day life. Only YOU can really take the reigns on your healing and educating YOURSELF is a huge step in that process. If you arent willing to read anything yourself and learn on your own time then in my opinion just stop paying for therapy because that alone will not fix anything and youre wasting your money. Im sorry if that comes off harsh but its true.

As far as support groups, i have kept to reddit. I have not yet found a great place outside of this and other subreddits. You will come across people who dont speak to you as a human wherever you go so that is unfortunately just something i think many of us have to get used to. I frequent this subreddit, the OSDD subreddit, one on dissociation, theres really a lot if you just take the time to look.

Educating myself and bringing my healing into my hands to some degree has been one of the most empowering things for me. I truly hope you rethink your attitude towards self educating. I understand how much money this all costs, but your mental health is not something you can just throw money at people to fix for you. You have to do the fixing with help. But you are the main key.

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2oevOP•

I do hear you though. I’ve historically had bad experiences trying to pinpoint my specific intersection of neurodivergence and mental illness growing up. Up until this year I hadn’t seen a professional in probably 7 years

1
2oevOP•

Money is so simple tho I go sell time and I have it :( reading takes time AND attention

0
etoneishayeuiskyunsure undiagnosed osdd1a•

Get an obviously valid diagnosis of PTSD or CPTSD. It's the easiest diagnosis for someone to relate to, and if they say they support the troops or sympathetic towards people then they have to support you fully or else look like a true dickhead.

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[deleted]•

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AshleyBoots•

"Other forms of plurality" aside from DID/OSDD/DDNOS don't exist.

7
deer_hobbies•

Because, as we all know, an understudied mechanism of the brain couldn't possibly ever be used except under the auspices of structural dissociation, which in itself is a theory with many detractors. Thank goodness we’re the only ones who are right and that we can be so certain.

-9
AshleyBoots•

"X hasn't been disproven" is not a synonym for "X exists".

9
understand_world•

[B] From the Subreddit rules:

Discussions encouraging “other forms of plurality”… will not be allowed.

I don’t mean any disrespect, I just wanted to point it out in case yous were not aware of it.

6
deer_hobbies•

I suppose it would be more accurate to recommend, then, that the OP find a community of other people who suffer from DID and follow strict adherence to medical guidelines, because it is helpful to find other people that are like you, and for me it was an extremely lonely existence even among longtime friends before I found others who suffer from it.

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