[1120] Honest chat

Hello hello, This is my first time posting here.

This bit is part of a longer story with more action in it. In this specific scene, I tried to depict an honest conversation about dating between 4 teenage boys. Having never been a teenage boy myself, I legitimately don't know how real this feels.

I'm also wondering wether such long bits of dialogue work or if I should cut it short. Are you entertained throughout the whole text or should I re-work my long dialogues completely differently ?

FYI, English is not my first language. I translated that specific bit because there is no such things as destructive readers in my own language. As a consequence, some of the sentences might seem unnatural. Do tell me if that is the case as it impacts the readability. Spelling and grammar may have some mistakes. Be aware that I am not that interested in these kinds of mistakes but more in the mechanics of the dialogue. Does it work? Would you read such long passages where no big scenes of action happen ?

Some context on the story before that passage: Jeremy is a new kid in town. He grew up in a war-ridden country. At this stage of the book, he is in a foster family and trying to find out the codes of what it means to be a normal teenager. He started dating Emma out of convenience because it makes him seem normal but struggles to understand how to behave with her. Connor, Alex and Julian are in the same friend group as him and Emma in school. All of the characters are about 16yo

[edit: more details]

My text is here

Text I've re-read : [1800]