sigh

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/xmsthv/pixelated_oblivion/ipsruiy/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3

my dad said the way i think about time is obsessive
i have never existed in a moment and only that moment - i’m always thinking about the next one and how this one will only last so long and what comes after and what was before and how 5 turns into 10 turns into 30 turns into 60
and all i could think about when you and i sat there on the sidewalk
was how we were in a time machine
i knew that this was our portal
our elevator
i knew that when we walked back to your house we’d step out of it
and i was going to have to make the rest up on my own from there
i was going to have to come to terms with our new reality
my new reality
i knew i would have to leave behind the time period from before we stepped in,
the one where we picked clovers and flowers and each other,
and step out into the one where i bike home puffy eyed and limp
where i wake up the next day to go to that stupid dumb awful bagel shop
and smile at customers saying good morning
pretending like my only reason for getting through each day wasn’t you. and that now i don’t have a reason to.