September Tenth

Workshop

Every year I sit here
Wishing you hadn’t left
Tears welling in my eyes
Every September Tenth

That day, you entered the room
In an obvious state of distress
You went directly to the shower
I thought to decompress

We were friendly, in passing
but while sharing a room
the closeness in proximity
never brought me closer to you.

One thing I knew was that
you took long, hot showers
so I didn't think twice when you
had disappeared for an hour

And I wish I'd known better
For when I heard the hollow
Thumps on the shower wall
My intuition just did not follow

I knocked on the door
No reply from inside
The door was locked
I just wish Id said goodbye

I picked the lock, and found you
your skin had turned blue
Eyes staring wide, and from your lips
hung a thin, silver strand of drool

I wish I'd done something
To save you, sweet Annabelle
I wish your children knew I'd tried
It was more than I could handle

I wish September Tenth
wasn't stained with my guilt
that it was just another day
unburdened from tears spilt

Over the years, I've eased the
weight of the burden on my back.
I didn't know, couldn't have known
In your silence, you'd made a pact.

I don't think I'll ever forget you,
for better or for worse
your memory a reminder of what
happens once you choose to leave this Earth

_____________________________________________________

This poem is a re-working of one that I had written about a month ago on September 10th. It is about the day that I found my old roommate Annabelle after she'd committed suicide. I wrote the first draft when I was pretty emotional but now I am ready to receive some constructive criticism about it.