I'm in bed crying while my partner is downstairs making us dinner

Usually I cook for us, but this is the second time in a week that he is. I've been in a rut recently. I'm 31 with a 21.5k salary. I started a career as an accountant July 2021. I like my job, most of my tasks nowadays are things I genuinely want to be doing. I'm also in college, set to finish a full accounting qualification for spring 2023. I've been working on it for a couple years now. I've got an exam in a week and a half, and a final synoptic exam in the spring.

I'm also looking to buy a house, or maybe part buy a house, hopefully in the next year. I've got some money for a deposit, and will have to take a small mortgage in my name alone. I can only get around 50k mortgage on my salary. I currently live with my partner in a house share. The homeowner/housemate is a good friend of ours, but I feel I've been pushing her away because I feel so unhappy living in a house share still after 13 years when I just want to live alone with my partner in a house that is ours. I don't want her to think I don't like her because I truly do, I just want for me and my partner to support ourselves, not someone elses mortgage. There's no return when you're renting and I feel like I'm throwing money away. And my partner and I need freedom to do what we want with a house, and privacy.

1.5 months ago I quit smoking cigarettes after 15 years. I've been drinking more lately. Not getting really drunk or anything, but more regularly like up to 3-4 times a week, anywhere from 2-5 drinks. More if I'm out with friends. I didn't drink this much before I quit smoking. I started vaping maybe a week ago but I haven't drank any less since then.

All this is too much though. I feel overwhelmed, and incompetent, and sad. I'm okay on a Saturday, but once Sunday afternoon comes I'm sad and anxious and stressed. I was recently diagnosed with migraines, I only got them for the first time after I started the final level of my qualification while working at the same time. Everything I'm doing right now is working towards my future, so I have little to no immediate gratification for all the hard work I'm putting in. The only thing in my life that keeps me above water is my dear partner, he's incredibly supportive and helpful and looks after me so well. I'm afraid if I didn't have him I'd be depressed again - I have a long history of it, but haven't had it since 2019 thankfully. I got out of it with lifestyle/diet changes and goal setting.

I just want to feel happy and confident again. I think I will probably feel a lot better next spring when I finish my qualification, but what do I do in the mean time? I can't spend the next 6 months crying almost every day, when I have a roof over my head, a partner I'm in love with who loves me the same, a career I genuinely like.. why can't I just enjoy the moment?