First Date

I can't help but feel nervous

as our hearts approach this threshold,

drawing closer to the eyelash-thin edge

between something friends and something more.

​

I can't help but feel worried

that something won't come across right,

or the strain of something new

will unravel the two of us

instead of pulling nice and taught.

​

Can I even tell you all these fears,

or would they just eat into the roots

and rot us from within?

​

I could sit here all day,

watching cars and people pass

the window of this café,

wondering all the time

how you might feel too.

​

Are you nervous? Worried? Afraid?

Are you also watching this rain

slowly fall around us

while thinking "oh gods,

what do we even do here?"

​

I wish I knew the answer.

I wish I knew the way

to reconcile this festering doubt

into hopeful concern

for whatever future we might have.

​

I wish I could take

the cold and bitter rain itself

and turn it into some nourishing spring,

but I can't.

​

All I can do

is just be with you now,

enjoying a simple coffee

in a cozy café together

while all around us

the world is a downpour.

​

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