A Poem to My Friend.

I think the message is solid but this feels like it could be a letter to anyone, which goes against the purpose of pieces like this. Of course, all poems allow you to see yourself in them. But being specific about the traits and characteristics that this person has that affects you makes it more engaging and ironically more related about.

Correct me if I’m wrong, and please don’t take offense, but based on this I would say English isn’t your first language?

I think there are a few things I struggle with this poem. I think that it would benefit from line breaks. “You were there/ always. As a child” really does have impact. I think the un-ordered rhyming is tough to pull off, money and honey rhyme comes off as callow (childish) without out any sense of irony. Finally, I just don’t think there are any particularly compelling images, certainly there are strong sentiments and heartwarming platitudes…but where is the piece of the poem I can feel/see/taste/hear?

All-in-all, I think this is a great sketch for what you want a poem to say, but I think you need to do some serious reworking. DM me if you do, I’d be happy to read it again.

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I like the that it feels intimate, like a letter to a dear friend, a former lover, someone with you without being with you.

Critically, all I can add is that it could be structured a bit better. But really, who cares so long as the message is delivered and felt on the other end.

Enjoyed it.

I love the emotion :) Kinda hits home for me

I truly enjoy how personal and raw this poem feels. The way you describe why you’re grateful for your friend, puts me into your perspective and allows me to feel how you feel.

I enjoyed the poem, but it's hard for me to relate as I don't have close friends.

That being said, it made me more sad than anything.

Not your fault, though.

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