EUNeutralizer

Its been 6 years since this happened, back then I was 15.

Story of the situation that happened. Me and my then partner were both wasted, she asked me to have sex with her and so we did. The next morning she said that I raped her, telling me that she was drunk and couldnt concent. I told her I was also drunk and by that logic coudnt concent either and the day before she had made the move to start the sex and througout it happening she seemed into it. The situation after that didnt really escalate, it was pretty much forgotten in a few days. But it has still left a mark on me, I cant get the words out of my head telling me that Im a rapist

Ever since it happened I’ve had issues trusting my s

Its been 6 years since this happened, back then I was 15.

Story of the situation that happened. Me and my then partner were both wasted, she asked me to have sex with her and so we did. The next morning she said that I raped her, telling me that she was drunk and couldnt concent. I told her I was also fucking drunk and by that logic coudnt concent either and the day before she had made the move to start the sex and througout it happening she seemed into it. The situation after that didnt really escalate, it was pretty much forgotten in a few days. But it has still left a mark on me, I cant get the words out of my head telling me that Im a rapist

Ever since it happened I’ve had issues tru

Ive been waiting for it to call for me, got the call yesterday, and today morning I dove in. I measured 26mg in my volcano, I was pretty sure this wouldnt get me to a full breakthrough. Well, I took my three hits, didnt even manage to empty the balloon when I fell in. My thoughts were trying to resist it happening, but then quickly I realised theres nothing to explain or to make sense off. I saw my self as a child, crying in a corner. A voice asked me what do you think they need? I answered with love and kindness. Then my child self dissolved and I was filled with the greatest warmth and all encompassing love I’ve ever felt, I felt so at peace with that moment. I sat there in that amazing fe

Any of you with experience, how should I do it. I was thinking of bombing a nice amount so I can get through the day and then come home to sleep

I have a drug problem, but I dont want to quit completely. I mostly use weed and psychedelics. But do amphetamine, coke, ket etc at parties. I have seasons where I abstain for a week or two and then just have a little bit of weed on a special day as a treat. But then I have seasons where I use daily.

I can see the pattern. When Im doing good I feel like I have control over my use. When things around me start turning bad I start using more. I always pick myself up and ”lock in” when I notice Ive been doing a bit too much, and then I take breaks and use less for a while.

But this cycle keeps on going. I feel good and confident when I use only a little bit on weekends but when I use daily I

Now Ive had one experience getting fucked and sucking guy off, but this was when I was 14 with my best friend and we were experimental this happened on a couple occasions but faded away. I did enjoy the experience or atleast I dont have negative feelings about it. Also had two relationships with women after that, and so havent had a chance to be curious about my bisexuality. My upbringing might not have been the best around homosexuality, especially friend groups growing up. So I feel I may have suppressed the fact that I might be bi like on a deeper level. I kinda have always thought of myself as bi but feel like I hadnt realized it truly.

I also have had a hard time fantasizing men for mo

I have over 50 trips with acid and a handful with shrooms and low-moderate doses of dmt. But Ive always just took shrooms and acid to go adventure outside, see cool places. Its been introspective for sure but Ive read about taking them in the dark in silence/with music that is like a deep dive to your subconcious. Is it really like that? I plan on taking 225ug in the dark when I have a day off to test the waters.

I have over 50 trips with acid and a handful with shrooms and low-moderate doses of dmt. But Ive always just took shrooms and acid to go adventure outside, see cool places. Its been introspective for sure but Ive read about taking them in the dark in silence/with music that is like a deep dive to your subconcious. Is it really like that? I plan on taking 225ug in the dark when I have a day off to test the waters.