Seriously it's really dumb or something, he's been sitting in the same place for like 30 minutes at least and all he does is preen his antennae or something. Also I'm not positive it's a grasshopper.
It's green, 3 inches long, has six main legs for walking, plus two mini T-rex arms for eating or some shit all with sticky barbs on them. Its face is longish and it looks like it has wings tucked away, but I'm not positive.
Name suggestions are totally welcome too.