a second/third/latter wave of grief is hitting me and it just, absolutely, sucks so bad. i’ve been in therapy, throwing myself healthily into work & study, spending quality time with loved ones, pursuing my interests & all round thriving, but even when the loneliness expectedly comes, god it hits hard
all these thoughts of things i shouldn’t have done or said; haunting echos of hurtful things he did & said (and later apologised for); just has me wishing I could go back and break up while we had the healthy chance to. whoever said ‘better to have loved & lost than never loved at all’ needs a bloody slap god damn this hurts






