aintso

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I remember a stint using Java in early 2000s and even though the portability and the extensive libraries and were exciting, the GUI experience was horrible. SWING was unbearably slow and it always felt a little off.

I figured that it was due to the growing pains of a young platform and just dealt with it. Even so, I avoided software written in Java whenever an alternative was available.

I've been using Java on a mac recently and it still looks off and lags horribly. What am I doing wrong? Does everyone just ignore it?

I've been spending a lot of time with a friend lately who has been slowly coming to terms with the facts that they seem to have developed a depressive disorder. They don't have enough energy to do all that they feel necessary, they often feel unworthy, disguisted with themselves, asocial and downright suicidal. There's been self-harm and psychotic episodes. They are seeing a therapist.

Naturally, as I care for them I'm trying to just be there, to help them get to the doctors' appointments and sometimes talk them through their issues, but I often don't feel competent enough and even when I do, I wish I could be more efficient at this.

There's a lot of context. I might mention that

Hello, reddit.

Disclaimer: I marked my profile as enbie and queer, which has apparently led to it bypassing the usual gender mechanics on dating sites. The one that everyone loves to bitch about, you know the one: female profiles getting overwhelmed with messages, most of them being cookie-cutter and not really engaging, while male ones barely ever being on the receiving end of new conversations, and not getting many replies as well.

I do proudly display a beard on the profile picture though, which does establish some expectations from the onset, even though I have an androgynous physique and have previously passed for several different genders.

Nowadays I’m effectively being a boring

Isn't it a hight time to be alive?

My google-fu is failing me, so I'm asking here. I've been struggling with a variety of psychological problems for years, and I feel that unwillingness to accept just how serious they are had held me back. I've tried some lifestyle interventions, which helped but not enough, then full-blown pharmacological regiment, which sucked.

I now want to admit defeat in dealing with myself and ask for help from a professional. Unfortunately, it's not as easy to just say it out loud, I have to actually find someone, and I don't know how to do that. I'm living in a non-Emglish speaking country, but I would be much more comfortable working with an Englishman (or a Canadian, or a kiwi, whatever), so that

I have found this article: http://jrm.sagepub.com/content/56/4/310.full.pdf

Which cites a bunch more and seems like a good entry point, but before delving into it I thought I'd ask here.

The main point they make is that it is better to practice with specific goals in mind, and not just put in the hours hands-on with the instrument. This seems kind of obvious, but that may simply be hindsight. It also implies that it's worth learning how to dissect problem into subproblems and how to analyze mistakes.

Since I'm at it I'm citing the juiciest part of the paper, where the authors present their observations on traits shared by those whose practice was the most successful:

A. Playing was hand

undulating senses meanings constellations coming apart and together again ever shifting bits and pieces of aspic morsels dainty effervescent exuberant ephemeral dying things living things things being things taking pride in being themselves haughty plain tumorous motes tumescent mites toppling mottles seething mettles tattling beetles teetering metes tumbling over one another down and every which way which was down now does anybody remember H frequencies the bottom of the universe dapples strains quaternarily expands every which way apart together again matter dark and energy luminous strays straddles edges were there ever edges everything is whole everything is one boundless bald brimming w

I've studied Norwegian for a couple of years, but I need someone to talk to, and I'm pretty shy and asocial, so finding conversational partners is a quite challenge to me. I'm well-versed in the arts and sciences, being a bookish sort of person, and passionate about things I find beautiful.